These could be normal people. She’s a college lecturer, he probably has an equally serious job, though the article fails to mention it, so maybe not. And yet at the sound of a bit of Arabic banter they are willing to condemn their fellow man as quick as look at him.

Welcome to the world now, please bring a straight-jacket and a sick-bag (Daily Mail, of course, and so they are championed as heroes):

British holidaymakers staged an unprecedented mutiny - refusing to allow their flight to take off until two men they feared were terrorists were forcibly removed.The extraordinary scenes happened after some of the 150 passengers on a Malaga-Manchester flight overheard two men of Asian appearance apparently talking Arabic.

Passengers told cabin crew they feared for their safety and demanded police action. Some stormed off the Monarch Airlines Airbus A320 minutes before it was due to leave the Costa del Sol at 3am. Others waiting for Flight ZB 613 in the departure lounge refused to board it.

…

The trouble in Malaga flared last Wednesday as two British citizens in their 20s waited in the departure lounge to board the pre-dawn flight and were heard talking what passengers took to be Arabic. Worries spread after a female passenger said she had heard something that alarmed her.

Passengers noticed that, despite the heat, the pair were wearing leather jackets and thick jumpers and were regularly checking their watches.

Initially, six passengers refused to board the flight. On board the aircraft, word reached one family. To the astonishment of cabin crew, they stood up and walked off, followed quickly by others.

The Monarch pilot - a highly experienced captain - accompanied by armed Civil Guard police and airport security staff, approached the two men and took their passports.

Half an hour later, police returned and escorted the two Asian passengers off the jet.

Newsflash people, London-New York is a politically significant route, Mally-Manchester less so. I have a cunning plan. Next time I fly Mally-London on sleayjet or the like, I’m going to choose the most tiresome, football-shirt-wearing, bald-headed thug (of which I will have quite a selection), call the stewardess over and say I heard him speaking in some foreign language and that he looks suspicious. Seeing as he’s probably scouse and some sort of knee-breaker this is all completely justified. Then I’ll demand they eject him from the flight.